Seven Drunken Nights
from Shark Party by Sam Mulligan
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lyrics
Well, as I came home on Monday night
As drunk as drunk could be
I saw a horse out in the yard where my old horse should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns that horse out in the yard where my old horse should be?"
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a lovely pig that my Mother sent to me
It's many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But a pig with a saddle on, I never saw before...
As I came home on Tuesday night
As drunk as drunk could be
I saw a coat behind the door where my old coat should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns that coat beside the door where my old coat should be?"
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a lovely blanket that my Mother sent to me
Well, many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But a blanket with some buttons on it, I never saw before...
As I came home on Wednesday night
I was as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a pipe upon the chair where my old pipe should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns that pipe upon the chair where my old pipe should be?"
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a lovely tin whistle that my Mother sent to me
Many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But tobacco in a tin whistle, I never saw before...
As I came home on Thursday night
I was as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two boots beside the bed where my two boots should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns those boots beside the bed where my two boots should be?"
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
Those are lovely geranium pots that my Mother sent to me!
Well, many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But laces on a geranium pot, I never saw before...
As I came home on Friday night
I was as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a head upon the bed where my old head should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns that head upon the bed where my old head should be?
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a baby boy that my Mother sent to me!
Well, many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But a baby boy with whiskers on, I never saw before...
Oh, it gets worse.
As I came home on Saturday night
I was as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two hands upon my wife's breasts where my two hands should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns those hands upon your breasts where my two hands should be?"
Oh you're drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a lovely nightgown that my Mother sent to me
Well, many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But a nightgown with fingernails on it, I never saw before...
It's Sunday night, I'm coming home
I'm as drunk as drunk could be
I open up my bedroom door and I can't even tell you what I see
So I says to the wife, I says to her, "You're very untrue to me
So I'm going back to the bar, farewell to thee!"
Now I'm drunk, I'm drunk, I'm a silly old fool
And now it's plain to see
Good friends, good beer, and my favorite stool
Is all I'll ever need
It's many a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more
But me, unhappy, at the bar, I never saw before!
Let's go!
We're going!
I'm drunk!
I'm a silly old fool!
Raise 'em, and drink!
As drunk as drunk could be
I saw a horse out in the yard where my old horse should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns that horse out in the yard where my old horse should be?"
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a lovely pig that my Mother sent to me
It's many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But a pig with a saddle on, I never saw before...
As I came home on Tuesday night
As drunk as drunk could be
I saw a coat behind the door where my old coat should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns that coat beside the door where my old coat should be?"
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a lovely blanket that my Mother sent to me
Well, many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But a blanket with some buttons on it, I never saw before...
As I came home on Wednesday night
I was as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a pipe upon the chair where my old pipe should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns that pipe upon the chair where my old pipe should be?"
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a lovely tin whistle that my Mother sent to me
Many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But tobacco in a tin whistle, I never saw before...
As I came home on Thursday night
I was as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two boots beside the bed where my two boots should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns those boots beside the bed where my two boots should be?"
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
Those are lovely geranium pots that my Mother sent to me!
Well, many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But laces on a geranium pot, I never saw before...
As I came home on Friday night
I was as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a head upon the bed where my old head should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns that head upon the bed where my old head should be?
Oh ya drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a baby boy that my Mother sent to me!
Well, many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But a baby boy with whiskers on, I never saw before...
Oh, it gets worse.
As I came home on Saturday night
I was as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two hands upon my wife's breasts where my two hands should be
So I called the wife and I says to her, "Will you kindly tell to me?
Who owns those hands upon your breasts where my two hands should be?"
Oh you're drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool
So drunk you cannot see!
That's a lovely nightgown that my Mother sent to me
Well, many a day I've traveled a hundred miles or more
But a nightgown with fingernails on it, I never saw before...
It's Sunday night, I'm coming home
I'm as drunk as drunk could be
I open up my bedroom door and I can't even tell you what I see
So I says to the wife, I says to her, "You're very untrue to me
So I'm going back to the bar, farewell to thee!"
Now I'm drunk, I'm drunk, I'm a silly old fool
And now it's plain to see
Good friends, good beer, and my favorite stool
Is all I'll ever need
It's many a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more
But me, unhappy, at the bar, I never saw before!
Let's go!
We're going!
I'm drunk!
I'm a silly old fool!
Raise 'em, and drink!
credits
from Shark Party,
released April 6, 2018
license
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about
Sam Mulligan
Sam Mulligan is a comedy+rock singer who specializes in sick guitar riffs and dope gameboy beats.
discography
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contact / help
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